Definitely mixing up my memories of my past few chemotherapy cycles. If not for the dates of the photos stored in my phone, it’d be impossible to recall.
Anyway, my 6th chemo cycle was one milestone cycle. Because before I started the entire chemotherapy treatment, my oncologist mentioned that depending on how my body copes, he may order to stop chemotherapy after 6 cycles because that’s when it’s deemed that it has been somewhat effective.
I was really looking forward to hit this milestone for I wished I can stop the treatment even though everything was going smoothly.
Of course, first disappointment came in when my 6th cycle was delayed due to low platelets and white blood cells. Instead of a 2-week interval, it became a 3-week interval, diluting the drug in my body.
For the least, RK kept me hyped up about catching that cycle because he just landed from his week-long business trip to US and decided to accompany me for chemotherapy for the first time. He has visited me at the daycare ward before to fetch me home after my treatment but he has never stayed the full day there before so I was ecstatic while he was plain bored.
He had three needs: WiFi, electricity point and chair. He said he could only fulfill two needs anywhere in the hospital so he was bored to death. He couldn’t really do his work. He couldn’t really loiter around. He was just wondering how my mom endured through all these boring waits all along.
Anyway, at least he got to meet the doctor and heard from the doctor himself that I was doing fine so doctor would continue to administer chemotherapy until I finish the treatment…
By now, I’ve started to notice that my side effects were not the same each cycle. In fact, they change quite drastically every two cycles. While I was glad that my eye pain, gum pain and finger cramp were diminishing, I wasn’t too sure if I liked the constipation, followed by diarrhea and toilet spurts that much. It’s not convenient when I get back to work. Even at home, I have to run to the toilet when there’s a short urge. It’s quite confusing and tiring.
Two weeks went by and I returned to the hospital for blood test, thinking everything would be back in place because doctor has reduced my chemo dosage to help me cope better. But nope. I failed my blood test again. My platelets were low. Not as low as the previous round but still not good enough to continue.
So I’ve been summoned to return the following week immediately. Sadness.
The last round when my chemo was delayed, I got bouts of nagging from my mom and brother. I knew that if I failed my blood test another round, I’d have to change my lifestyle; to be less normal and to be more patient-like. The “another round” came so fast. Now I’ve got to figure out new work-life balance. Like literally, work-life balance.
